Sunday, December 5, 2010

Something to think about*

This is actually a forward- you know one of those forward emails from a friend that wants to share something with you that you might be interested in... Yeah those. Well it's such an inspirational and a positive email I thought I should share it with you my loves.

I thank the person (my sweetheart) for sharing this email with me-yeah you. I love you and thank you love!

To the ones that took their time out if their busy schedule thank you for stopping by and I'm sure you will enjoy this.

What do you think of this?


You are never to old to set a new goal or to dream a new dream. Les Brown

Not sure who wrote this, but gives you something to think about!


When I first heard of the movie "For Colored Girls" I got so excited. I had the idea of getting as many women together that I could think of to go see this movie. I had visions of group discussions and moments shared with one another that would lead to healing and growth, I guess I kind of imagined a Womens Empowerment Conference type of setting.

Well after I shared my idea with a few women, reality set in and I realized that so many of us wouldn't be willing to participate for various reasons: You don't like me, you don't care for somebody I might invite, you only hang out with certain people, you don't understand the big deal about Tyler Perry making yet another movie about black people and our issues for all the world to see, you don't like crowds, so n so is too ghetto, such and such is too uppity etc... It has ALWAYS amazed me that we as black women are each others biggest critics. We are the quickest to bring each other down, find each others faults and nit pick at a sister until she has nothing left, nothing left to give and then we step over her and call her worthless. We take the prettiest women and tear them down for thinking "they are cute" but turn around and dog the average sista because "she know she should take better care of herself than that - can't believe she got a man!" We call strong women female dogs and accuse weaker women of riding somebody else's coat tails. We tell a big sista to put down her burger and turn around and criticize a skinny woman for not picking one up. We ride the loud mouth woman for "talking to darn much" and likewise torment the quiet woman for "Being too quiet and needing to take up for herself" Sad part is we don't discriminate, we talk about everybody!!!

I've watched women dog out everybody from Oprah for catering to white people and Halle Berry for not being able to keep a man to young Willow Smith for acting to darn grown in her recent video. All of these females are successful and there is something about each one of them to be proud of but a lot of us can't seem to see that. I have to wonder since we all share a common thread (whether we want to admit it or not) is there something about ourselves that we don't like, what has happened to us that we cannot seem to get along. Why is that we fight amongst ourselves, backstab & steal each others men(only to find out we should have left him where we found him). We cannot seem to be unified to support and stick up for one another. Everybody seems to be out for themselves while other groups unite against us but nobody else has to bring us down because we trample on the spirits of each other daily.

Even if you live in a mini mansion, drive a luxury car, have good credit, rich handsome husband etc, this does not mean that should look down your nose at the woman with 4 kids, no husband, living in income based housing struggling to keep her lights on. We ALWAYS think the grass is greener on the other side, I had a woman who's child father is MIA tell me that I should never complain because I receive a decent amount of child support and I laughed and let her know that I would gladly give every dime back if he would come relieve some of this overwhelming pressure of feeling inadequate as a parent. If I could get just one full night of sleep or not always be on the verge of losing my job because Im the one that has to call off or leave work for one reason or another to accommodate my child - yeah he could DEFINITELY have his money if I could have some peace! Money alone doesn't make you happy (not true happiness), good credit doesn't keep you satisfied, beauty doesn't make you any less insecure, fame doesn't make you less vulnerable or cause you to be a good judge of character and being stuck up and mean doesn't keep you warm at night or prevent you from being lonely.

You don't know how the sista sitting right next to could have carefully put on her make up this morning to hide the beating from last night. The teacher you handed your child over to this morning could have sent her children off to school from a dark house with empty bellies. The teller you just got rude with at the bank could know that today is her last day on her job and have no idea how she is going to survive past next weekend. The sista at the office that appears so busy could be typing her goodbyes to all the people that she loves because she plans to blow her brains out tonight after she tucks her babies into bed. The woman you pass in the hallway could be on her way to have an abortion because she fears what others might think or how the woman that sent you this e-mail may drink an over abundance of alcohol every night to mask the nightmares of an abusive childhood.

Ladies we HAVE TO DO BETTER!!! I'm not suggesting that we all like each other and be phony, But I am asking that we all try to respect each other. You HAVE NO IDEA what the next woman is going through, you don't know what past or current hurt and pains have shaped her into who she is today. We spend so much time trying to be as strong and hard as we are expected to be that we end up cracking from the inside out piece by piece. If we would spend 1/3 of the time we spend tearing each other down to build someone up, encourage someone, show someone some love, we could truly make a difference and save someone's life. PLEASE don't be the straw that breaks another woman's back. Believe me when I tell you that there is a woman out there that needs your smile, your hug, your support, your prayer.

I hope that you read this and get something out of it other than a laugh and that you pass this on to as many women as you can to let someone know that you believe they are somebody special and that if need be you are available to listen. Nothing bad is going to happen if you don't forward this e-mail but I'd like to think that something positive will happen if you choose to pass it along. May favor be extended to each and everyone of your lives, keep your head up and know that someone somewhere cares!!!


Sent from my iPhone

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving!

So another thanksgiving huh?
I know we all are happy to get a chance to see another thanksgiving-I know I am grateful, not only because I have great family, but I have some amazing friends in my life-thank GOD to that. And of course my good health that I'm always grateful for.

Yes I helped out in the kitchen for the first time on Thanksgiving today and I feel so accomplished that I get to be productive instead of staying in bed and let mom do all the slave work.
Let's see, umm I made the stuffing, mac and cheese, croissant , dressing, prep the salad and so on. It could've been just the dressing I'd still feel good about it.

Anyway I won't be going on and on about this but hope everyone and their mamas had/still having a bless thanksgiving.

Thanks for taking the time out to read this.

Val!

Sent from my iPhone

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Oh Bondey ede mwen non sil vouple!

Mwen pa kon'n ki kote pou mwen konmanse onkon evre wi senye. Oh papa Bondey mwen yan ede pitit out non. Mwen tande on move nouvel yeswa ki ka chanje lavi mwen senye. Eski se vre? Eski si mwen pa tande mouve bagay ap pase'm? Esi e teste wa'p teste pitit ou ws pou gade si mwen pa respecte paran'm ou byen ou menm? Mwen fatige...mwen fatige e mwen fatige mantal, fizical and spiritwal-man. Vakanse sa mwen merite li..mwen travay di pou lajan'm senye....se sa sel man mwen bezwen wi bondye...se denye vakanse sa mwen mande ou wi senye...sil vouple senye! Bondye ed pitit ou.. mesi anpil! Link

Thursday, November 11, 2010

What's in store for you this Thanksgiving?

Now that Halloween and Veterans day is over...what's next again? ummm...oh yeah we have Thanksgiving right around the corner in exactly two week right? .. *checking out my calendar* uhhhhh..yep it is in two weeks. Are you ready for Thanksgiving? Have you decided on who's going to get busy in the kitchen or not? Would it be you...your partner...the parents..maybe one of them? Come on now someone has to prepare the big dinner :-) ..or will you be going to friends and eat up all their food? Last year for Thanksgiving I went to my "friends" house, we cooked and actually had a great time. Sometimes when you don't want to be bothered with all the messes and the cleaning you just go to friends house..am I right? :-) well not always the case because I helped them cleaned. This year I plan on getting busy in the kitchen-yep I said it. I plan on cooking Thanksgiving dinner for the family and I am very excited about that. I will also bake...I'd love to try to bake rum cake (although I'm not too good with the baking) but I will try to make some maybe this week or so and practice to see how it'll come out. Since I know someone who makes those on a regular I'll be asking for her help :-) I am too excited. That will be my plan this Thanksgiving. I won't be working-I need a break. Link

Monday, November 8, 2010

Alicia Keys - Un-thinkable (I'm Ready)...yeah I am :-)

Alicia Keys - Un-thinkable (I'm Ready)...yeah I am :-) I am so happy to share this song with you. Yeah I am late-what's new again? haaa haaa As much as I LOVE this song I really don't think the video fits the song well-my opinion! This song I feel like I am living it...I am happy where I am right now. I am grateful to have someone like her in my life. Just listen to the words and you'll see how I'm really doing :-)

Sunday, October 31, 2010

HAPPY LATE-HALLOWEEN AND ALL THAT

...Ok today is Halloween...blah blah we know that! I honestly don't care for this "holiday" really. I mean it's good for the kids-yeah KIDS! because kids are allowed to pretend to be something else they're not but us adults (some) live as someone else-how sad! ...(since I give people their credits). One of my twitter buddies (@meliastarfucks) who RT'ed a quote by (@THE_BOONDOCKS). He tweeted "How is Halloween different from any other day? ;people already pretending to be something they're not"-it's totally true. Who cares about Halloween? I'd say. I guess I'm never into those things-dressing up and all that stuff. I actually tried doing and getting all excited about the costume thing for a while but then I say "fuck it!"...I stopped caring about stuff like that. I rather save my money...stay home relax because after all I need it. I need my energy and my body is not the same as it was a couple of years ago haa haa #TRUTH though. anyway i hope everyone and their mamas had a safe Halloween! now time to get ya asses on a diet with all that nasty candy inside you :-)

Saturday, October 16, 2010

A quick hello!

Hello world! I am back...I know you all missed me *wink* How are you guys and gals doing? What's new? ...now on my end all is great with me. My mom came back all well. ...wel so is my dad-ughhh! now with him now is something else. As much as I love the miserable man I would sort of ok if he was still over there (lord forgive me). Don't get me wrong I appreciate him and he's a great father but when he starts talking and nagging it's like I want to get away..he never seems to know when to STOP yapping! If I had Oprah's money I'd send him away for a while to go on a vacation. Seems to me he'smore happy back home and it's weird..Hmm! well he feels more at home and at peace. Hope you all are ready to have a wonderful productive fall and winter-I am so ready :-)